The harshnes you are getting is not from setting the bowl up wrong its from AF, it does that if its not set up perfectly, after you packed your bowl tap it down a bit (the first video you showed do that but tap it down after you packed it) i cant really explain how to do it in a mod bowl, as i always use a phunnel but if you check out my video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p5OenG74ftI
it might help
And you were getting no taste first time because the holes were way to big.
Also did you clean your razan hose when you bought it?
Also 3 coals on the outter edge would be how many you need, and as they burn move them in