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Old October 26th, 2008, 12:46 PM
Kalkail's Avatar
Status: Offline
Hookah Nut
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New York City
Posts: 348
Default Story: The Bowl that would not die!

It was a dark and stormy night, the trees were snapping as the sharp unforgiving wind whipped them fore and aft mercilessly, alongside the torrential rains that punished the earth below with nihilistic fervor. I sat looking upon the tumultuous sights and voiced out 'Let's try out that Blue Mist I got' unaware of the perilous pact I was about to forge.

The sacrifical hookah was snatched from the corner it was cowering in, weighted down and filled with frigid water then sealed as swift as can be. Cruelly foregoing the grommet seal a hose was jammed into its only available orifice. The hermetic seal was blithely rent from the package and shisha fell feather light 'round the unyielding metal vortex. Without a moment wasted the shisha was covered, brutally deprived of light save for a scant dusting of breathing holes. So it sat awaiting the implements of torture to be ignited.

Hot coals were turned upon the flames shimmering with searing heat before being placed upon the breathing holes, closing off what little light was afforded. The foil sizzled on contact adding heat to the alchemical ceremony. The hose collected a long pull setting pyretic air whistling though the bowl, heating everything in its path. Ominous bubbling immediately announced the chords of the evening's symphony. The coals, already a febrile red, blazed bright with promise as the inspiration called them to labor. Soon wafts of exhilarant smoke began to spiral from the bowl as the summoning ritual was at last complete. The shisha was alive! ALIVE!

Moments passed that the spoils of the liturgy were enjoyed, 'Minty!' one exclaimed while another extolled the pleasant cloying nature of the berry. Earnestly the cycle continued, the harrowing coals, the anguishing bubbles and the subsequent delectable smoke. As the heat grew unbearable the shisha's fragile mint soon got snuffed out delicate as it was. Quickly, the coals were tempered and once again the seemingly unblemished mint whispered back into the smoke. Time continued to trickle down the hourglass as everyone shared in the sweet if piacular vapor. Unexpectedly the coals gave up their heat and were reduced to fine pale ash, which caused voices round to clamor for more heat, clearly the bowl had more secrets to share and coals are the only way to extract them!

This is when the victim of our scorching ministrations took control. Hours continued to pass, coals were defeated and cast aside, cold and spent. The devotees grew tired, worn by the toils of smoke, and retired, backing away from the bowl that would die. A fourth coal was placed as the clock chimed the third hour of the smoking bowl, A thought struck the mistress of ceremony, perhaps the bowl would hold its secrets after all? Time that was once an asset became a concern as the ritual left but one patron standing. Abruptly, the shisha changed, no more mint and only the weakest threads of berry, at last it was defeated! Or was it?

The coal was removed, the foil pulled back and there lying among the dustings of fine ash and blackened tobacco were still clumps of perfectly moist goodness. Clever shisha was using subterfuge to mask its secrets! There was not a moment to waste, the now willing victim was mashed then diseminated throughout one more time before the coals were placed back upon it. In a thrice it began to smoke fine as can be, uninjured by the scrutiny, content to yield evermore minty berry delights. It would seem the victim was now the transgressor.

Another hour, another coal and the shisha was clearly in charge. Feebly pulling at the hose only yielded swirls of true delicious smoke, the tobacco beginning to sing its secrets now that it was sure victory was at hand. The remaining attendant wavered in her seat, placing one last coal upon the foil in a last ditch attempt at supremacy. The coal blazed, the everliving shisha reveled as the clock chimed into the fifth hour.

In the end the final valiant smoker surrendered, bested by the Blue Mist. The hose was laid to rest, the remaining embers of the coal were snuffed and the bowl was left to its own devices, its secrets never to be fully uncovered. This is penned as a warning to all:


This is a story about Friday night's Starbuzz Blue Mist bowl that lasted through an entire roll of Akhla coals and well over five hours before I finally had to leave it alone. In the spirit of the season I thought people would get a giggle out of this. Enjoy!
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